Booze: Rickety Eyeball Punch
1.5 oz gin
1 oz blueberry syrup
Eyeball ice cubes
Mix first three ingredients. For the eyeballs, use a melon baller to scoop out round pieces of pear. Insert a small blueberry in the middle of each and freeze. Add to drinks and serve.
B-Movie: The Crawling Eye aka The Trollenberg Terror
The Trollenberg Terror, aka The Crawling Eye, is a 1958 sci-fi horror film about a mountain resort town that has recently been besieged by some kind of unidentified terror that rips the heads off of otherwise healthy mountain climbers. Until a bunch of European vacationers bond over their mutual love of alcohol and hatred of headlessness and band together to try and stop the terror. The group includes a crazy Professor who looks like Disney duck Ludwig Von Drake, Anne the traveling psychic, Hans the put-upon manservant, and a couple of other white guys I couldn’t keep straight. I think Philip is Anne’s love interest, and there’s also our hero, Alan Brooks. According to Wikipedia, Brooks is a UN ‘fixer’ who just happens to be on holiday at the same time these strange beheadings are occurring. Seems fishy to me. After Anne has one of her ‘episodes’, the men take a trip up the mountain and find Dewhurst’s (aka the Fat One) headless body. Shortly after that, Brett (aka the Other One) shows up with said head in his backpack and attacks another rescuer with a pick-axe. Logically, they all immediately assume it must be aliens. No discussion of an axe-wielding serial killer hanging out on the mountain, or some kind of cold mountain fever that drives people insane. Either of those theories would make way more sense, by the way. But no, it must be aliens. Because of some cloud. And the Andes, whatever that has to do with anything. And of course, they’re right. It is aliens; big, eyeball-looking aliens who only like the cold and also are able to possess men for pretty much the sole purpose of making them try to murder Anne, because somehow the aliens seem to think she is their biggest threat. And she could be. Sadly, we’ll never find out, because every time Anne tries do anything in this movie, one of the men stops her! Yes, Anne is the real hero here. Forget what I said earlier. If not for her, none of the men would even have known the Fat One and the Other One were in danger! And if they hadn’t sent her down the mountain, ‘for her own good,’ Hans might still be alive today. Maybe not today, today, since this was filmed in 1958, but you get the point.
“I’m going to throw a bomb at that one. You watch on the screen and see what happens!”
Toward the end, when a miniature Philip gets tangled up in one of the eyeball . . . tentacles, I guess? Sadly, he gets loose.
Best Time to Freshen Your Drink:
Any time is good. Honestly, the majority of this movie is just a bunch of men sitting around talking and drinking.
Take a Drink Whenever:
- We meet someone with a new accent
- Someone makes a reference to a head being torn off
- Someone orders a drink
- Anne has a psychic episode
- Someone orders Hans around
- The Professor uses his video screens. Better than windows!
- Someone mentions the Andes incident
- Someone rides the cable car. Bonus drink if it’s unclear whether they’re going up or down the mountain.
- The eyeball finally makes an appearance
Finish Your Drink When:
The military plane bombs the observatory where all the civilians are hiding, on orders from Brooks. What kind of authority does this guy have, anyway?
Cocktail Rating: 🍸 🍸 🍸 🍸
Both delicious and fun! Most of us agreed that while we aren’t usually gin drinkers, the flavors in this one melded perfectly! Plus, it’s hard not to like a drink with floating eyeballs. Or is that just me?
Movie Rating: 🐝 🐝
The most exciting thing about this film is the title. Which makes sense, because it was initially released as The Trollenberg Terror, but somewhere along the way some marketing guy thought ‘The Crawling Eye’ would put more butts in seats. He was right, but they should have added more crawling eyes if they wanted to keep them there. Honestly, between the boredom and the mansplaining, I was hard-pressed to watch this all the way to the end. And what did I get for my troubles? Not even the satisfaction of getting to see Alan or Philip’s heads ripped off! Felt like a lot of build-up for a whole lotta nothing, which pretty much sums up this entire movie. I’m giving it two bees just for the sheer absurdity of a plot that involves aliens who look like eyeballs and can only survive in the cold and also have some sort of mind-control capabilities, but it takes a particularly bad filmmaker to make that set-up boring. And not the good kind of bad.